This is a song about my ex-girlfriend
I won't say her name/I won't offend
But I've only really dated one girl
So it won't be too hard to see through
My veiled descriptions

I used to think she was pretty attractive
But now my disgust is retroactive
I can't imagine kissing her on the mouth
I just hear her yell out/scream and shout

M-Dizzle/you can't be emotional
It makes it so hard to get close to you

Well maybe if you stopped inventing problems
And took some time to think about
solutions to the stuff you're causin'

Take some time to breathe
And think before you f--ing speak
Then maybe you wouldn't be screaming
I just took time to brush my teeth
I need some space to come out from under your deceit
Been barely three weeks and already you f--ing cheat

Just for the record/I broke up with her
Not to do so would have been really absurd
Even my own parents suggested it
So you know that it is superbly legit

I mean/seriously/she'd named our kids
It's been two weeks/god forbid
We wait a little bit
Get to know each other
Come on/I'll take the hint

She wanted to name our daughter Elyson
E-L-Y-S-O-N
She didn't consult me
I didn't like the name
She'd decided it with her last boyfriend
And she thought it would make sense to carry it over into her new relationship
With a new person
Who she's been barely been dating two weeks
I mean
What the hell
That's ridiculously self-centered
And stupid
And clingy
And really rushing things
Who does that

I know none of this relationship can be my fault
I can't read that deep inside that vault
She calls a mind
To know what to say at just the right time
To make her happy/I'm supposed to be her lifeline
Is there anything I could have done
Anything under the sun
I would done it
I would have saved us
I would have made us
Into what we said we could be
Each night cuddled up right next to the TV
And I don't miss a thing
And I don't need to be
With someone else to feel complete
But I can't help but feel a little bit of longing for what could have been
But I know that's wrong to miss something so absolutely wretched

I have no regrets
I would have broken up again 'cause none that was worth it
It needed to end
And now you need to admit that maybe it wasn't me
It was both of us working together to be apart
A part of something greater
A world where we aren't lovers
And I am enjoying this distance like no other
Because I finally let myself stop being smothered
By that thing you called love while I just shuddered